September 20, 2010

More on Tides

I've read over my Tides of Life post several times since it went on the blog.  I think there's another side to consider.  The tide brings new people into our lives but it also carries others away.  Through various means, we lose people...some we're glad to see go but others...well, we don't want to let go.  It's a struggle to watch people fade out of your life, especially people who've left their mark on your heart.  As I look back, I can see the faces of folks who've passed to the other side.  And folks who've left our cove in search of a better one.  Does the tide ever turn?  Will they wash back into our cove again?  Is it all beyond our control?  I'm exhausted just thinking about it.  I guess it's hard to grasp change.  It's hard to justify hanging on to folks who are trying to move on.  Or maybe it's the fact that they want to that's hard to accept.  I think maybe that's it.  Maybe it's not that they don't fight to maintain the status quo...it's because they don't want the status quo to stay the same.  When you invest a lot of time, effort and love into trying to make it easier, it becomes your battle, not theirs.  You pull and nudge and tug, encourage, advise, direct and even admonish to make dreams come true but when those dreams are gone, you're still trying to fix things that don't matter anymore.  But what really puzzles me is this; if it really was a dream, a status quo to maintain, a reason to stay in the cove, why didn't they fight for it then?  Why didn't they hold on tight?  Maybe they didn't want it as much as they thought they did.  Maybe there are too many compromises to be made and it isn't worth the sacrifice anymore.  Meanwhile, we've become so dedicated to working it out so the dream can come true that we're left feeling like...well, you know!
And now, it seems like the tide has come and all is different, the footprints are filled in and the treasures are lost.  Through various means we lose people... and it's really too bad.

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